Spew

Trouble visits Terry's Berries

STEPH DEROSA: MEET LISA TUPPER >>>

For those of you who have been living under the rocks located outside of Kentucky Fried Chicken’s front landscaping, there is such a thing as locally grown organic produce. And for those of you who have not clued in to the uber-hip culture that surrounds everything locally grown and organic – this Trouble’s for you.

I’ve been visiting Terry’s Berries on River Road for a few years. I thought it was about time I picked on their staff and uncovered their organic-loving roots.  As per the usual, owners Terry and Dick Carkner were too busy rustling through their fields to talk to me.  Well, at least that’s the excuse they gave. You can’t fool me; I know avoidance when I see it.

So I cornered Terry’s Berries manager Lisa Tupper for a chat. Read the interview here.

Our new lunch diversion

STEPH DEROSA: ASADO IS OPEN FOR LUNCH >>>

Just about the only thing frowned upon here at the Weekly Volcano is drinking on deadline day, which is Monday. Having this nugget of knowledge engraved inside my brain leaves a scab so infected that all I want to do is pick at it. Feeling spring fever hit my body, and the need to rebel against deadlines, I took it upon myself to tie one on — on a Monday. Look, someone had to do it, and I often think I’m the one at the Weekly Volcano with any balls. Asado was open for lunch for the first time this past Monday, owner Johnny Xitco was hooking me up, so off I went.

In order to lower my chances of getting in trouble, I made Pappi Swarner come with me. Was it a smart idea? Absolutely. He had just as much fun as I did.

Skeeter’s Lounge

STEPH DEROSA: BAR EXAM >>>

I don’t know what it was, but a craving developed inside me that I’ve never felt before, and it was all I could do but to order Skeeter Lounge’s biscuits and homemade gravy. I think my liver knew I was about to corrode the hell out of it with my Midland pub crawl, so fair warning had been sent to my stomach in preparation. Right here, right now — I’m gonna say it: Those were the best damned biscuits and gravy I’ve ever had in my boozehound-livin’ life. Go there. Eat them. You will thank me.

Is Skeeter's Lounge a dive or not? Find out here.

Tossing Salad: Marlene’s Market and Deli

STEPH DEROSA: FRUIT AND VEGGIE CLEANSE >>>

Marlene’s Lunch
Price: $6.29
Rating: four out of four croutons

 

The sun has woken up and the temperature has peaked above 50 degrees. All is good here in the Pacific Northwest as summer awaits us and attitudes begin to improve. I feel motivated to detox my Volcano-induced, alcohol-laden liver with a fruit and veggie cleanse lasting approximately five days. After this cleanse I do what I can to keep on the straight and narrow, and Marlene’s always has the successful meal I need to accomplish this: Marlene’s Lunch.

Description: Tender, spring greens are tossed in Marlene’s secret spices (shhh!) and a light oil/vinegar combination. Full crowns of raw cauliflower and broccoli are included in this mix, as it’s all topped off with fresh tomato slices. In tow alongside this lettuce mixture is a solid warm brown rice mound housing cubes of soy cheese generously tucked inside. There are soy cheese options, and they come as Monterrey Jack or Pepper Jack cheese. I always pick the Pepper Jack because I love my stuff spicy, but in the end you can hardly taste the peppers.

Tea House, B & I Marketplace

STEPH DEROSA: SLOW BURN >>>

Szechwan Chicken
Tea House – B & I Marketplace
Price: $5.45
Burn Factor: Three our of four Molotov cocktails

Mr. DeRosa laughed after I told him I was headed to B&I Marketplace.  I had been intrigued about the housed flea-market-type establishment after a friend informed me it’s where she purchased her beautiful clip-in hair extensions made out of REAL hair.  Being the type to constantly seek instant gratification (and the type to do whatever Mr. DeRosa laughs at), I hauled ass to Lakewood in search of clip-in hair extensions.

What advice did Mr. DeRosa have for me before I left?  Just don’t eat there.  (Oh, you know this meant I had to eat there.)

Amongst my options inside B&I’s food court were Taz Pizza, King’s Burgers, Tacoma’s Own Cheesesteaks, and El 7 Mares serving cow goiter and tongue.  I opted for the safe option, and the one with the longest line: Tea House.  Being a teriyaki joint, they had to have something spicy — like Szechwan Chicken.  I asked them to make it as hot as possible, found my seat in the food court, and my instant gratification-seeking ass sat and waited.

Shamrock Tavern

STEPH DEROSA: BAR EXAM >>>

He called me a “piece of cheese.” Ray from Roy, the uber-president of my imaginary fan club consisting of three members (Hi dad!), referred to me as a wedge of moldy milk. As I entered Shamrock Tavern on Pacific Avenue near Spanaway, I located the only open bar top seat and introduced myself to bartender Mike. It was at that moment that Ray from Roy popped out of the Shamrock’s fixtures like a rabid squirrel hiding in the bushes and hugged me. Apparently he reads the Bar Exam, and apparently he likes it. This made my freakin’ day. Even if he called me a “piece of cheese.”

Read my review of the Shamrock Tavern here.

Gikan Teriyaki #7

STEPH DEROSA: SLOW BURN >>>

Spicy Chicken and Mushroom
Gikan Teriyaki #7
Price: $8.95
Burn Factor: Three out of four Molotov cocktails

So I ventured to Gikan Teriyaki #7 for this week’s Slow Burn. What’s funny is trying to imagine the Gikan Teriyaki #2, #3, or #5.  Are they all the same? Is the original Gikan Teriyaki #1 all uppity because it was the original?  Do they really own seven of them, or is it because six other Korean couples took the name “Gikan Teriyaki”?  Questions like these haunt me at night as I try to sleep.  Yes, that’s how lame my brain is.  Look, yours would be drained as well if you had to work amongst men who wear pajamas to the office and overuse played-out pop-culture phrases like “You go girl!” Ugh.

Gikan Teriyaki calls it like they see it.  Their dish “Spicy Chicken and Mushroom” is exactly that.  For those of you who have already checked out for your Memorial Day holiday, let me explain: It is nothing but chicken pieces, mushrooms, and spicy sauce.  None of that bullshit some other competingteriyaki joints might put in the dish as fillers, like water chestnuts.  Water chestnuts in a teriyaki dish are like croutons in a salad — cheap, tasteless, and utterly useless.

As for the slow burn factor, and as with pretty much any spicy Asian dish, the sooner you eat it before it cools down, the fiery the pepper heat.  As it filled my belly, the Spicy Chicken and Mushroom plate from Gikan Teriyaki set a quaint blaze to my mouth and kept me happy. 

[Gikan Teriyaki #7, 900 Meridian E., Milton, 253-952-3473]

Unicorn Sports Bar

STEPH DEROSA: BAR EXAM >>>

Large rusted coffee cans littered with old cigarette buts rest beneath the patio tables in Unicorn Sports Bar’s serene patio as I prepare to meet some friends for a sunny afternoon beer. Unicorn’s outdoor space is well crafted with accents including English Ivy, flowering plants, landscaped rock, and a towering waterfall. Wood fencing is built with plexi-glass windows in order to not deter from the beautiful view of Commencement Bay.

OK, now answer me this: From the description I just presented you with, this doesn’t sound like a dive bar, right? Wrong. Read why here.

Go Local Tacoma Day

STEPH DEROSA: GO LOCAL TAKES OVER THE TACOMA FARMERS MARKET TOMORROW >>>

If Tacoma were a big college dorm room, we’d have empty cans of PBR covering the floor and a consistently empty toilet paper roll. We’d eat cold Puget Sound Pizza for breakfast, develop a kick-ass Facebook group, and have an immense amount of pride in what we have to offer. So much so that we’d have matching tattoos that said, “Go Local or DIE.” We’d be best friends and never date each other’s ex’s, right?

To be a part of such a community calls for sustainability from all its inhabitants, and it calls for organizations like Go Local Tacoma, a group for local, independent businesses, which offers them a surplus of support. Much like the support found in a lifelong comrade, local business owners and their patrons alike can feel pride within our fair city, and with Go Local Tacoma — something not a lot of communities can pull off. In economic times like these, Tacoma can do it — and Tacoma will.

Like a big social gathering held in the commons of my little imaginary college campus I made up for you earlier, there will be an extra-curricular event known as “Go Local Tacoma Day” to be held at the opening day of the Tacoma Farmer’s Market Thursday, May 21 in downtown Tacoma on Broadway. In addition to members of “Go Local Tacoma” being on hand, visitors can enjoy the Iron Chef like "Cheffin' Off," to be judged by local celebrities and city officials. (Not to be mistaken with the shirt ironing competition your mom will be in.) Along with local music by Kevin Davis and members of China Davis (oh hell yeah), there will also be a gardening demonstration at the Foodie Fun Clinic and multiple family friendly activities. Shazam! This is going to be awesome.

[Tacoma Farmers Market, 9 a.m. to 2 p.m., free, Broadway between Ninth and 11th streets, downtown Tacoma]

Tossing Salad: Mandolin Cafe

STEPH DEROSA: AWESOME SALAD FOLLOWED BY SOMETHING NOT SO AWESOME >>>

Strawberry and Chicken Salad

Mandolin Cafe

Price: $6

Rating: four out of four croutons

Amongst the bustle of kitchen expansion construction, daytime internet surfers, and small, friendly meetings, I found myself comfortably perched at my very own roomy table where I set up shop for the day. Although Mandolin Café has a steady stream of constant traffic, it is rare you will find yourself in an uncomfortable seat. After a fun conversation with Mandolin’s manager, Sarah Jane, some typing time in front of my little laptop and the deafening pounding of kitchen construction — my appetite (and headache) had risen to its limit. I perused the deli case and found the most colorful item available to order. When Sarah Jane refused to sell me her pink hair and informed me that it was not part of the lunch selection, I opted for the Strawberry Chicken Salad instead.